An Interview About Nothing

Yorick, as you well know, is not a journalist. God forbid, this job didn’t even exist when he was born, but it was invented in the meantime, so, compared to me, it is a young lass that he is looking at with a little bit of admiration, and some humour…

Yorick kind of likes the smell of printing ink from the printed newspapers, which will probably become museum items, although the conservatives inveterately deny such a possibility. Enfin, we shall see. The old fool reads interviews. He likes them. He thinks that a more offering form of journalism, however it may be, doesn’t exist. And the interviews with people from the theatre world are a staggeringly rich subject.

It’s as if you had in front of you an empty body which a. either is detached and has the sense of humour, which saves him; b. or he is intimidated and hides; c. or is embarrassed, but gathers himself and the possibilities may go on. All right. There’s nothing new under the sun.

The fool riffles through the newspapers, as many as there are left on these Romanian lands, and looks for what interests him. Like an interview with Vlad Zamfirescu, a very interesting actor he has known for several years, ever since he was acting in plays by Pirandello at Bulandra, for example. A wise actor with personality and sensibility. That is, a delicacy. A man of ideas, who administers a cultural association. You could talk with him about whatever crosses your mind.

Now, please take care of your health and don’t grow stiff as you read the questions that poor artist has to answer to: “The play <Second Day God> is built on two different perspectives of the same story. Do you think that in a relationship, the different perception of love comes from the different sex of the partners?”

Don’t think that’s all, even though it says it all! The idea itself, the hollow preciosity built on a precarious and grammatically incoherent expression and most of all the lack of a guiding idea? What does the reporter ask the interviewee? If love is the same for both men and women! What an insulting question for any mind, no matter how lazy it may be!

How could anyone start an interview with something like that? What do you actually want to ask? Yorick thinks you want to ask something else, but you don’t succeed. Hence, a postmodern theeing and thouing which is supposed to simulate – I don’t understand why – intimacy, incoherence, just to express myself in a euphemistic manner. The interview is already dated, and the interviewee is an innocent victim.

“One of the central themes of the play lies in the dysfunctional relationship between parents and children. You are a father as well. How would you like to be perceived by your son Matei, when he grows up?”

The question develops logically from the beginning, right? What, does it matter what the man answered? It fits like a glove, doesn’t it? Pure logic, crystal clear! From the same category as “Show me yours, and I’ll show you mine.” Alrighty. And I’m not going to say one word about “grammaticality”. So far, I’ve seen a lot of people trying to speak and also to express something when they do that! But still, I ask, catching up the idea: Where does another central theme lie? Does it sound okay?

“Does the auditorium affect in any way your performance? What’s it like on a big stage, like that of the National Theatre, compared to that of the Act Theatre?”

Well, what can we say?! So far, it has been good, but now it’s getting worse! How could it be on a big stage? Not like on a small one, of course. Did you understand? The connection with what’s been said before is crystal clear, just like the theme of the interview… And what do you think pops out next? Actually, taking into account what’s been said so far, anything is possible: What is your favourite food? What are your plans for the future? What role would you like to play? or anything else. But it goes on…

“What is your opinion on the improvisation from the theatre?”

Not “improvisation in theatre”, God forbid! What opinion could the poor man have, when he’s talking to the walls. How could anyone ask an actor with experience something like that? It’s the same as asking a writer his opinion on writing. Upon my word! Who knows what she wanted to ask, but couldn’t, not even this time?

And, although we’ve all formed an opinion, I’m going to quote yet another two questions, without commenting them:

“How do you react when something unexpected happens on stage?” and “Could you give me a few examples of such accidents?

This is an interview from “Romania libera”. If you don’t believe me, go to

Do some people really have nothing better to do?

Translated by Raluca Motoc, MTTLC, 2nd year


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